Quick answer
Most families pay for assisted living privately, combining monthly income (Social Security, pensions), savings and the proceeds from selling the home. Other sources include long-term care insurance, VA Aid and Attendance for eligible veterans and surviving spouses, and Medicaid waivers that may pay for care services. Medicare doesn't pay. In 2025 the median was $5,975 a month in Kansas and $5,400 in Missouri. (800) 614-8388 to talk through a plan.
Ways families pay
| Source | How it helps | Worth knowing |
|---|---|---|
| Income | Social Security, pensions, annuities cover part of the monthly bill | Start here: know the monthly gap |
| Savings and investments | Cover the gap month to month | Work out how many months they last |
| Selling the home | Often the biggest source | Timing matters; some families rent it out or use short-term financing until it sells |
| Long-term care insurance | Daily or monthly benefit once eligible | Read the policy: elimination period, benefit amount, covered settings |
| VA pension with Aid and Attendance | Monthly payment for eligible wartime veterans and surviving spouses | Income and net worth limits apply |
| Medicaid waivers | May pay care services for people who qualify | Usually not room and board; limited communities |
| Life insurance options | Some policies can be converted or borrowed against | Get independent advice first |
| Family help | Children share the monthly gap | Write down who pays what |
Step 1: find the monthly gap
Add up your parent's monthly income. Subtract the quoted monthly cost of the community, including the care level. That's the gap. Then divide savings by the gap to see how many months it lasts. Our assisted living cost calculator does this for you.
Step 2: check benefits early
- VA. A wartime veteran or surviving spouse who needs help with daily activities may qualify for a VA pension with Aid and Attendance. For 2026 the maximum annual pension rate with Aid and Attendance is $29,093 for a veteran with no dependents. See Aid and Attendance.
- Long-term care insurance. Find the policy and call the insurer about how to start a claim.
- Medicaid. If savings are limited, ask your Area Agency on Aging about a Medicaid screening. See Medicaid and assisted living.
Step 3: think about the house
For many families the house pays for care. Options include selling, renting it out, or a short-term loan until it sells. See selling a parent's home. Get advice before using a reverse mortgage or changing ownership.
Taxes
Some assisted living costs may count as medical expenses for tax purposes, especially when a person is chronically ill and care follows a plan from a licensed health care practitioner. IRS Publication 502 explains the rules; ask a tax professional about your parent's situation.
Want help working out a plan?
We'll walk through the options and point you to the right agencies and communities that fit the budget. Free.
Questions families ask
What is the cheapest way to pay for assisted living?
Using income and benefits you already qualify for, like a VA pension, before drawing down savings. Compare communities, since prices vary widely.
Can I use my parent's house to pay for assisted living?
Yes. Many families sell the home or rent it out. Talk with a real estate professional and, for complex cases, an elder law attorney.
What happens if the money runs out?
Ask before moving in whether the community accepts Medicaid and lets residents stay. Plan ahead with your Area Agency on Aging.
Can family members share the cost?
Yes. Put the arrangement in writing so everyone knows who pays what.
Sources
- CareScout Cost of Care Survey 2025, Median Cost Data Tables (survey July to November 2025; median cost data tables, published March 2026)
- Medicare.gov: Long-term care coverage
- VA.gov: Veterans Pension rates (effective December 1, 2025)
- VA.gov: Aid and Attendance and Housebound benefits
- IRS Publication 502, Medical and Dental Expenses
- Eldercare Locator (U.S. Administration for Community Living), 1-800-677-1116